a minute

the uncertainties of life and death makes us all vulnerable to tragedies. to tragedies we are afraid of. tragedies we fear to mourn. tragedies we try hard and even harder to escape. tragedies we couldnt escape. because life. the awful and unjust way of life showing us our worth. not more than a minute.

the plane crashed a minute before landing. a minute. that could have been more than enough to say the final goodbye. a minute. sixty seconds. and it all ended. turned to dust. to despair. to eternal longing.

you know what that minute was. for the ones parted today. it was the shortest moment  of their life. filled with agony. chaos. crisis. prayers. flashbacks. that made it even more shorter. shorter than the farthest star that appears on the sky. shorter than the final breath of a dying patient. shorter than an enraged sigh. shorter than everything.

and for the ones left alone. with endless pain. that minute. eternal. a forever. to mourn. to suffer. that makes it even more unbearable. unbearable to even think of. and to live with it. to survive. to keep up with the pace of life. life that halted everything within a minute. ruined everything for them. that minute that now would take forever to heal.

tragedies here on earth keep unfolding before us in worst ways ever imagined. in ways never imagined. and we. the fallen ones. never have enough time to recover. to gather our pieces back. to heal. does life not owe us anything. not even the final goodbye. not even the last minute of our life.

yet life still has the audacity to move on with all its majestic meanness. no remorse. not a tiny little hint of guilt. no reverence for our resilience. nothing. it just moves one. and everything around  moves on. and for that very moment when life should stop for the bereaved to mourn it doesnt. it doesnt stop. for us. for our tragedy. not once. not for a minute.

and the sky remains intact. witnessing above. the wreckage beneath. sharing our secret. but never fades for us. never weet with us. for us. not even once. not even for a minute.

and the earth. it doesnt move an inch. but keeps spinning. the burden we carry doesnt wear it off. it never falls apart. not for a minute.

and the clock keeps ticking. but the time freezes. and the numbness perpetuates deeper. yet the clock ticks at a fixed pace. and never stops. not even for a minute.

but for those hit by the calamity. their life stops forever. their sky fades in disdain. their earth shatters in pieces. not just once. not twice. but every single minute of their life.

honor killing

and another sun

succumbed to despair

and another moon

shunned away

and another sky

turned to ashes

and all the stars

shattered to dust

and all the heavens

shaken to core

but the mighty earth

with ‘mighty’ beings

remained aloof

of crimes committed

in darkest hours

grim tales

of motherland

silent burials

of honor and pride

odes to our

daughters plight

kabul

opened twitter after a while and was dumbfounded with the news of terror attack on maternity hospital in Afghanistan. absolute horrendous massacre of new born babies and mothers whove suffered the pain of nine months just to be greeted with such barbarism. you have to stoop the levels so not worthy of humans to even think of murdering children, let alone new borns.

taliban have always proved how lowly how absolutely not worthy of being spared or shown any mercy. there must have been a special hell solely made for them. for the crimes they committed. and the burning fire that too must have been enraged of their horrific acts.

if God is displeased with this land he has legit reasons. if his wrath let the world die on its own he would be so right. if the sky decides to break apart and wreak havoc and turns everything to dust it wouldnt be so wrong. if the earth is so adamant to shatter what is left to ruin whatever remains it wouldnt be so unfair. if the world decides to die unhealed a painful lonely and silent death it wouldnt be unjust but a deserving act.

but you know whats wrong. whats unfair. what the world doesnt deserve. our awful silences. and empty laughters. and deadly ignorance. and blatant callousness. and us being alive and so content with life. when life is absolutely being so nasty so unkind so cruel to others. where normalcy returns only for a down payment. and beat the hell out of our people. with whom we might not share our nationalities. our race. our religion. our culture. but with whom we are so bounded by. humanity.

i hope kabul forgives us one day. us all. our silence. our laughter. our ignorance. our callousness.

even if it does. i wont. i wont forgive our silence. our laughter. our ignorance. our callousness.

because when people die because of someones silence. someones laughter. someones ignorance. someones callousness. they dont just die. they die a thousand deaths. they dont turn into stars to flicker later on for the people they left to mourn. they dont turn into flowers to bloom for them. they dont turn into poems either to be read aloud. they simply become ruins. shattered dreams. unfinished poetry. they simply turn to statistics. so dreadfully unjust to turn humans into numbers.

سنا رہی ہیں

یہ کس کے خوابوں کی کرچیاں ہیں جو فسردہ قصے سنا رہی ہیں
یہ کس کے ٹوٹے دلوں پہ رقصاں بہاریں دکھڑے سنا رہی ہیں

میرے وطن کی اداس شامیں وہ نوحہ کرتے اجاڑ منظر
کسی شکستہ دل مسافر کی آج کتہا سنا رہی ہیں

نہ آرزو وصال ہے نہ غم فراق ہے جاں گسل
شہر ویراں کی حسرتیں یہ کچھ اور نغمے سنا رہی ہیں

جو چلے تو رستے ہی کھو دئیے جو ملے تو پھر سے گنواں دیئے
وہ تھکی ہوئی سی مساوتیں بھی زوال ہستی سنا رہی ہیں

وہ جو رازدان حیات تھے وہ جو ہمسفر میرے ساتھ
انہیں چھوڑ کر کسی دشت میں یہ ہوایں بدلے سنا رہی ہیں

Ye kisky khuwabon ki kirchiyan hain jo fasurda qissy suna rahi hain
Ye kisky tooty dilon pe raqsan baharain dukhry suna rahi hain

Mery watan ki udas shamain, wo noha karty ujar manzar
Kisi shikasta dil e musafir ki aj katha suna rahi hain

Na arzo e wisal hy na ghum e firaq hy  jan ghusal
Shehar e veeran ki hasratain ye kuch aur naghme suna rahi hain

Jo chaly tu rasty hi kho diye, jo mily tu phir sy gawa diye
Wo thaki hoi si musafitain bhi zawal e hasti suna rahi hain

Wo jo razdan e hayaat thy, wo jo humsafar mery sath thy
Unhy chor kar kisi dasht main, ye hawain badlay suna rahi hain

i dont care

you know what happens when people lose hope. they become fearless. nothing on stake. nothing to lose. anymore. and what happens when people become fearless. they stop caring. and when people no longer care nothing in this whole damn world matters then.

i dont care if the world remains this way. still and at halt. upended. i no longer care if it dies unhealed.

i no longer worry about our pale skies. about the dying sun fading away before half light. or the mighty mountains crumbling in fear. or the rushing streams drying out. or the gasping stars losing their paths.

i dont care if the world dies unhealed. like us.

or if its story remains incomplete. like ours.

i no longer care if its poems remain unfinished.

or if its sunsets go unnoticed. 

or if no one writes back to it. or if its letters remain without postage. without address. unnamed. like us. 

or if the hatred so engulfing it. eats it away.

or if the garb of hypocrisy it wears so proudly. taints its very appearance. 

or if it loses its own self in awful vengeance. to hold its power. 

i dont care. 

 if the world. dies. unhealed. 

 

 

 

adieu

i burnt them down

the poems i wrote

and made them die

a silent death

deeper in heart

i buried my words

choking alone

along my love

never requited

these verses

a final goodbye

to my motherland

whose cities are carried

inside of me

and runs through

whose fragrance in me

on whose sky

i flew my kites

and walked down

whose crowded streets

chasing behind

whose parting sun

adieu

for your callous being

wore me out

the burden

no longer

i can carry

the pain

no longer

i can bury

pardon…..

for me

and my haggard pen

afoot

in utmost reverence

implore

to thy scared land

we wont write you

anymore

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ہماری داستاں

ہماری داستانوں میں سبھی رنگین قصے ہیں
گو تھوڑے ہیں مگر سارے غم فرقت کے حصے ہیں

سوئے مقتل طلوع سحر دبے پاوں چلے آئے
تیرے بندے عجب یارب لئے ہاتھوں میں سر آئے

جو پنہا دست قاتل ہے یزیدی آرزو لکھو
حسینی ترجمانی ہے ہماری داستاں لکھو

زمین و آسماں بھی محو رقصاں ہوں جو وصلت ہو
اسیری میں جو ہو تو پھر فقط نصر من اللہ ہو

سبھی عشق و وفا کے سانحے میں اول از درجہ
محمد کے غلاموں کو جو بد تر کافریں سمجھا

خودی پھر داستانوں میں عد و یار بن بیٹھے
وہاں فرعوں تھے بندے یاں خدا ہی بن بیٹھے

Hamari daastano’n main sabhi rangeen qissay hain
Go thory hain maagr sary gham e furqat ky hissay hain

Sou e maqtal ta’lou e sahar daby pao’n chaly aye
Tery bandy ajab ya rab, liye hatho’n main sir aye

Jo pinha dast e qatil hy yazeedi arzoo likho
Hussaini tarjumani hay hamari dastaa’n likho

Zameeno’n asmaa’n bhi mehw e raksa’n hu’n jo waslat ho
Aseeri main jo hu tu phir faqat nasrun minal allah ho.

Sabhi ishq o wafa ky san’hy main awal az darja
Muhammad ky ghulamo’n ko jo bad taar kafree’n samjha

Khudi phir dastano’n main adou e yaar ban bethy
Wahan fir’aun thy bandy yaan khuda hi ban bethy

homage

it makes me so sad and baffled at both the inherent hatred and humiliation reserved for us by our countrymen for long. so so long. and the ceaseless display of patience and forbearance of my people. two dichotomies. unparalleled. unprecedented. set forth to marvel at the unjust and partial world we live in. often words come heedlessly. sometimes paying regards to my people. sometimes weeping at the cruelties faced by them. sometimes doing both.

filled with spite and venomous hearts

our countrymen pay tributes in parts

nothing but hatred at grim display

nothing at altar but love to slay

enraged, the storm sojourns our home

busting to let the fear roam

charged with treachery betrayal alike

infidels thus the butchering on spike

a tale penned with loyal blood

akin to life shunned in bud

a tale so committed so aching to read

bound to break adamant to bleed

a tale erased from desecrated graves

absolute disdain for our braves

a tale demolished with holy places

aimed at shunning the godly traces

a tale ablaze along our houses

fueling the steady burning crisis

a tale slain with aching dawn

weary of burying and woebegone

a tale hanging in utter darkness

settled on noose and nothing less

a tale seeded with head held high

nourished and fed by heavenly sky

the healing continues…

one step ahead

with heart healed

with soul fluttering

with hopes blooming

with head held high

with eyes glittering

and boom

comes the tiny fall

pushing back

to abyss

of utter despair

bottomless pit

with walls high

so high to reach

with darkness visible

where everything sinks

and keep sinking

until

we are back

to start anew

and thus

the healing

continues..

 

final goodbye…

death.

what is it?

people walking around you. people you were so accustomed to meet every now often. people you wake up with. people you grow up with. people youre emotionally involved with. people. your people. cease to exist. just like that. without proper goodbyes. without any goodbye.

no its not just they who stop existing. its the whole world they were part of decides to show how things are so different without them. how theyll remain so different without them. because theyve stopped existing. disappeared. now the sky wont be as blue as it is supposed to be. now the birds no longer sing their morning songs but keep humming the elegies. now the sunset would lose its hues before even being noticed. now the world around you moves but in silence. in dead silence. you pass by several streets. and more streets. and you keep walking but you dont stop. because you cant stop. because you dont know how to stop. because those who walked you down the streets have disappeared. now you dont know how to stop.

how easy. within a blink of an eye. that easy. and people are gone. and you keep staring at this parting. questions. so many lurking around. full of remorse. regrets. keep pounding. was this really the parting. the letting go thing. or was it something to dwell and nurture inside of you. the separation. the final goodbye without any goodbye.

so how you cope with it then. knowing things would have been better. slightly. the last phone call. the last meeting. the last dinner. the last walk. the last laughter. the last prayer. the last argument. if only we knew they were the last. we should have known. we deserve to know.

no one deserves to die without their final goodbye. at least those left behind deserve to have their say. how theyre going to survive with heavy hearts then. how theyre going to move ahead then. their skies wont be same again. not even blue. their sunsets wont have any color. their birds wont even sing for them. because they were just a final goodbye away. and it made the separation way to distant to even imagine.

life. more unjust than death itself. death. turns everything at halt. stillness. around and within. void. life. it moves on. keeps moving on. death doesnt let you have your final goodbye. life. it doesnt give you enough time to mourn over your final goodbye. because life goes on. just for that very little moment you want life to stop for you but it doesnt.
how terrible it is to find that life goes on when you are being left behind. with your final goodbyes. sometimes all you want from to stop for a moment. everything. to freeze. to stay silent. to remain empty. emotionless. life. it must stop for some moments. for people like us to mourn. make amends. to settle dues. to let go. life must stop for us. and it pains me more when at my worst im reminded of being alive. life goes on ha. no. it shouldnt. it should have stopped. for me. for my tragedy. it shouldve mourned with me. it should have shed some tears with me. it. should. have.