If

A thousand reasons

To run along

The untrodden paths

A thousand reasons

To quench the thirst

From the oasis of life

To let the spring flowers

Bloom and sparkle

On the barren lands

A thousand reasons

To make amends

To settle dues

A thousand reasons

To stay alive

But if the heart is dead

Its dead.

#thoughts #poem #words #wordpower #poetry #wordart #wordcraft

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Poem

And what do you do

When you fall apart

When darkness resides

And sun departs?

When the heart reeks

Of anguish and distress

And inviolable fragrance

Turns to dust

Loitering on streets

Abandoned and bleak

Like a forelorn traveler

In a lonely desert

Under the sky, naked

Wanders alone

On the trodden paths

And sings elegies

To the barren land

Where nothing of worth

Grows and blooms

Where darkness resides

And things fall apart.

#poem #words #wordcraft #freeverse #poetry #thoughts

A peacock calls in the grove of passion

For many days I’ve contemplated on the verse

‘is ishq di jhangi wich mor bulenda’

(A peacock calls in the grove of passion)

To know why Bhulleh Shah ( sufi mystic) used ‘mor/peacock’ and not other figure for this expression.

So before exploring this particular verse, one should know the background first. ‘Tery ishq nachaya’ (your love has made me dance like mad) was written for his spiritual master Shah Inayat Hussain, for whom Bhulleh Shah had great reverence and discipleship. But Bhulleh Shah’s family was against such spiritual relationship because Bhulleh Shah was a ‘syed’ ( a noble caste among Muslims, the direct descendants of the Prophet) and his master was an ‘ Arain’ (a caste considerd lowly in comparison to sayeds) His family tried to induce him to give up Inayat and find another master. He refused.

It is then he wrote ‘Bhulleh nun samjhawan ayan behna tay parjhayan’ (Bhulleh shah’s sisters and sister in laws came to convince him) narrating the whole story. The song I first heard in Khuda Kay liye (for the sake of God, the movie) but couldn’t comprehend a single word until now.

Inayat though himself upon realizing his family’s attitude, parted his ways.

He immediately went to Inayat’s house. Knocked on the door. The converstaion goes..
Kaun?’ (Who)
‘Mein Bullah ann’ (I am Bullah)
‘Tu Bullah nai tu bhulliyan ann’(You are not Bullah, you are lost)
Knowing that what was given to him had been taken away, pained him a lot.

He figured out his master loved dancing. So he asked the dancing girls to teach him how to dance. Bhulleh Shah then dressed in woman’s clothing went straight to his murshid’s house and started singing ‘tery ishq nachaya’ (your love made me dance)

It’s striking how it starts with ‘chaiti avi,vay tabiba nai ty main mar gayan’ ( come my healer or else i die) reflecting the intensity of pain Bhulleh Shah had from this separation. ‘Tabiba’ means doctor, a healer which can loosly translate to his murshid.

So that was the backdrop of ‘tery ishq nachaya’
Now lets look at the significance of ‘mor/peacock’.

In Greek and Persian, mor often connotes to immortality. Freedom and independence. Which if put in context does not make much sense.

So what other explanation is left?
Well.
Mor/peacock is a bird that dances to please others. Here in this particular verse, Bhulleh Shah does not use mor as a symbol but as an analogy to compare his own state to that of a peacock.

That is, like a mor (peacock) he’s trying to lure his master. Which is followed by ‘ sanon qibla ty kaba sona yar dasenda’ indicating complete surrender, Ulitimate submission.

Ps. The beauty and purity of this poem cannot be fully deciphered!

#words #poetry #sufipoetry #sufism #philosophy #life #wisdom #thoughts

Balance.

(Poetic interpretation, like art is a matter of subjectivity. Same poetic piece can be a masterpiece for many and obscure for others.)

Many times while contemplating on life, what it really is, i often stuck with confusions. Of all the philosphical and literary text i have read this far, they pushed me further in the utter bottomless state of chaos and labyrinthine yet ivent come closer to even unwind the inner conflicts.

My struggle to decipher the undertones of life comes to an end one afternoon in American Poetry’s lecture. While discussing one of Frost’s poems, my professor linked few verses penned down by Bhulleh Shah and an urdu couplet of whose poet i no longer had in my memory.

Upon further searching, i found it was by Mirza Ghalib, the man who nurtured urdu verse and kept urdu language intact through his poetry.

The couplet in urdu goes like this.

Imaan mujhy roke hay tu keenchy han mujhy kufar

Kaaba mery peechy hy tu kaleesa mery agay

(Faith limits and whereas the idolatry lures me

Kaaba is behind me and the church stands ahead)

The literal backdrop of this couplet is merely the enforced conversions during British rule in india where modern philosophy evolving new trends of life conflicting the predisposed ideas.

Yet, To me this meaningful and voluminous vereses with an extended metaphor encompass the essence of life. Its ups and downs. Its struggles. The meaning. The totality of definition. Everything.

The worldly obligations, moral and social limitations as defined by the society have an exhausting affect on human mind. They chain human heart and thus cage it forever.

But what allures the heart, is all the forbidden things. That bring pains and suffering.

Here the analogy of Frosts ‘ stopping by woods’ is thus far the most suited one.

The woods are lovely dark and deep

But i have promises to keep.

Again, the worldly obligation the consciousness, the knowledge of being right and wrong, keeps human heart from being fully content.

Thus, to achieve happiness and satisfaction, which human heart is always seeking, it is requisite to really believe what Darwin says. Being adaptable to change. To our surroundings. To survive.

To thrive with the thorns of life. Not to eradicate them. Because thats not what we born for.

There are days, when we feel completely hopeless. Depression dwells deeper. Because all of us, want life to be perfect. Free of distractions. Chaos. Like a straight one lane road without any speed breakers. Because our limited and conservative imagination fails to comprehend the rule on which the universe works. Balance. The cyclic nature. It aint a one sided road. It cant be. Its a balance between two extremes. Two opposites that do not at all negate each other but complement.

#life #thoughts #philosophy #poetry #words

To a country that never loved me back

There are questions lurking around, asking for dues, to make amends. There are answers hidden beneath the coffin of despair, apologizing but I still don’t know from where should I start. From the love I was deprived of or from the hatred reserved for me in advance. Pouring out my grievances, my despairs, my longings, my love for the country that never loved me back.

It would be sheer ungratefulness if I say I’m not safe or happy here. It would be sheer injustice to those who died fighting for their identities if I say I’m safe here. The space, the empitness between these two narratives is where I live. Utter emptiness. Vaccum. That chokes my breath. Sometimes..

I was born in small town with rustic nostalgia all around. With each passing day, like a bud grows on an unexpected place, love for this country was engraved upon this stubborn heart. With each passing day the urge to be loved in return intensified. But has anyone ever seen the sunsets of my country? How terribly beautiful they are. My story is bit of that sunset. That legit goes unnoticed. Even with all those hues and colors on the sky beautifying its nameless cities.

Living in a country with laws against you and your community is not easy. With every devoted sun that rises defying the darkness, I vow to remain loyal to my country despite all odds. With every night that hides the flaws I fervently pray for my country despite its inhumane treatment to my community. In the photographs I capture, in the odes I write, on the roads I travel, at the mountains I visit, in the streets I walk, in my longings, despair, dispondency, in my sighs cries and unshed tears, there’s a question my heart keeps on asking . Will my country ever be able to own me? With every bullet that kills my people. With every fire that fuels the hatred. With every accusation of being treacherous. Every time my country throws me out when I need it the most, a part of me dies sinking deep in the bottomless pit of utter dispondency where I long for the answer ” will my country ever going to stop treating me and my cummunity as illegitimates? Am I ever going to witness the day my country instead of disowning me embrace me for who I am?”

Despite all broken pieces, despite all wreckages , this tender heart still beats for Pakistan. My motherland. But im tired now. Im not strong enough to further carry the load of one sided love. Im not strong enough to burry my people every now and then. Im not strong enough to keep on watching the silent screams of the bereaved families. Im tired of reminding myself that I have not paid my debt yet. My country needs me. My prayers. And here I am, with every fall, standing with my country. Because loving it has never been an option. It is an obligation.

To hope. To love. To prosperity.

An Ahmadi.

A city so broken

Desolate and barren

The spring weeps

In despair and sorrow

And sings elegies

To the aching wounds

Of the naked alleys

To the parched air

Drenched in tears

Behind whose mist

Quivering in pain

Stands a city

With head held high

A city so broken

So empty and dim

A city with love

Abandoned and blinned

A city of fragrance

And scented rose

A city now death’s

And blood’s odour

#peshawar #poem #poetry #wordcraft

To ones who lost among the stars

(Originally shared with the Unread Magazine.)

A nightly walk

Full of stars

And thoughts

Too distant

Too deep

Empty, them both

Crowded, them both

A broken melody

Of winter’s eve

A muted symphony

Of a heart’s beat

A tragic tale

Of departed love

An ode to broken

Lyre of wind

To dreams, abandoned

To souls, bereaved

The ones who lost

Among the stars

#poem #words #wordcraft

Poem

With every sun

That sets in despair

With every moon

That darkens the sky

With every star

That fades away

With every leaf

That withers away

With every day

That blurs the vision

With every night

That haunts the darkness

With every sigh

Of the doomed heart

With every tear

Of agony and distress

With empty laughs

And silent screams

Daughters of my land

Are burried and abandoned

Deep and distant

Their dreams

Their hopes

Their corpse

#poetry #poem #honorkillings #womenrights #words #wordstory #QandeelBaloch #Juticeforzainab #justiceformehwish #justiceforasiabibi #justiceforourdaughers

I wonder why..

By the river of solitude

Amidst the turmoil

Under the orchard of grief

I wonder why

The tortured silence

In the country, reigns

I wonder why the hate rules

And terror roams

I wonder why the sky loses

the hues and freshness at dawn

At dusk it faints and pines for love

Why the night is afraid

Of its own darkness

And screams aloud

With the stars above

I wonder why..

The birds no longer

Long to fly

And sing the elegies

To the lost love

I wonder why..

#poem #poetry #words #wordcraft

A broken song

The deafening silence on recent on going atrocities against Palestine is appalling. Freedom is a luxury they cant afford unless we stand with them. The tragedy of Gaza is more tragic than all the tragic plays of Greek, French and English literature and still cant be penned down for you need those alphabets those words that cant be said for they are too devastating, too destructive, too dreadful and too catastrophic. Trying to play my part via the only thing I think I am slightly good at.

A broken song.

Melancholic rhythms

Of sorrow and grief

Of death conjoined

With endless pain

Toll the knell

The city bleeds

Broken melodies

Of abandoned love

And tumultuous peace

Despaired ashes

Of tormented freedom

Lurk around

To mourn

To curse

The imposed silence

Of those who hear

Of those who see

Commiting a crime

Of sinful breed.

#Gaza #Genocide